Things I Can't Say
Since my father died
there are things I can't say
things I won't say
things, I've not words to say
​
becoming anew does not take away the bad
growing small does not remove pain
​
since my father died
there are things I can't say
things I won't say
things, I haven't any words to say
​
that we will get better at getting better
that we will eradicate the bad and leave only room for good
that the good becomes fragmented and the bad, a memory
​
that I will forget you ever existed
that we existed
​
that many days ago, the sun shone
your body was still warm
​
if you were waiting on an island for me,
I would not be upset
​
like the Flies, like the Pearl, like small Mice and Big Men
you changed me
​
It doesn't pain you like it pains me
like it pained me
like I am pained
​
I can see it, but I don't know how to get there
I can see you, but I've not a way to get there
like I can see it, but there exists too many ways to get there
​
2021